Happy Halloween! Beauty Is Horror!

11 horror films and their beauty culture counterparts.

It’s almost Halloween, the beauty industry’s favorite holiday!

Horror has always imitated beauty culture, or beauty culture has always imitated horror; the two are essentially interchangeable. See: This fun little list of Horror Films & Their Beauty Culture Counterparts (excerpted from a previously published article on M. Night Shayamalan’s ‘Old’.)

“Friday The 13th” & LED Masks

A little move trivia for ya: Jason Voorhees was actually wearing an early prototype of the Dr. Dennis Gross LED mask.

“The Silence Of The Lambs” & Resurfacing Treatments

One could say Buffalo Bill was the original skin resurfacer…

“The Purge” & Retinol

I don’t think I have to explain this one. (I already did.)

“A Nightmare On Elm Street” & Chemical Peels

The real villain here isn’t Freddy Krueger, it’s Max Jessner, and I stand by that.

“Hellraiser” & Microneedling

Pinhead’s collagen production increased by 50% by the time filming wrapped.

“The Sixth Sense” & Lotion P50

Whoa, what if our fear of dead skin cells is just a more manageable manifestation of our fear of dying…? Eh, no, you’re right, probably not.

“The Picture Of Dorian Gray” & Instagram Filters

The original Filter vs. Reality.

“Rosemary’s Baby” & The Penis Facial

Epidermal growth factor harvested from fetal foreskin? Pure terror.

“The Shining” & Glass Skin

OK, this one is more about the name than the plot, but still. I think it works?

“The Twilight Zone” & Nose Jobs

In Hollywood, this nose is The Best Nose. In that “Twilight Zone” episode, pig nose is The Best Nose. There is no ideological difference!

“When A Stranger Calls” & Beauty Culture

Beauty culture starts conditioning us the second we slip outta the womb. Our brains absorb its messages before we can think for ourselves. When we finally can think for ourselves, we think we think what beauty culture taught us to think (I think?), but we don’t!! I know I quote Tressie McMillan Cottom too much, but in the words of Tressie McMillan Cottom, “I like what I like is always a capitalist lie.” Cue: Dissatisfaction! Anxiety! Frustration! Always striving to be better, prettier, younger, thinner, smoother, clearer, Eurocentric-er — and sort of feeling like you enjoy the process? performing beauty is fun! — but never really feeling like you’ll get there. Like you’re good enough. Like there’s an end point. The reason it’s so hard to disengage from beauty culture is because… drumroll, please… the call is coming from inside the house.

Scary, right?