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This is huge. This is one of the HUGE things that feels like you’re overreacting because of its hugeness but it’s really huge. Yes to paddleboarding, yes to sunshine and joy, no to microblading. Whether you decided to do it in the future or not, it’s so wonderful that you’re putting yourself FIRST over what others may think of you. That is real and true beauty. I hope you had a wonderful time in the water today.

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Thank you!!!

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Aug 11, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

My heart!! This speaks to my soul today. "I’d rather feel the ocean on my face than feel beautiful." Thank you for sharing.

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Thank you for reading <3

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Aug 11, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing. I have really paired down my beauty routine, even just went back to my natural hair color (mostly), and have given up starving myself. But my eyebrows have become my focus for some reason. I am likely perimenopausal and my eyebrow are naturally thinning. To say I’ve been stressed about them is an understatement. Your sharing about your brow-journey is helpful and a reminder for me to keep doing the inner anti-diet/beauty-industry work. It pays off. Thank you. ❤️

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It's such a process, am I right?? But yes, it very much pays off.

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This is so important, ESPECIALLY because the work you do is to help people break down how they interact with ~*beauty*~

Knowing you’re a person who experiences the push and pull of knowing it’s not you it’s patriarchy and still struggle with it anyway makes taking in your content (which I find delicious anyway) all the more digestible.

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That's so nice to hear. Thank you Chryssa <3

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Aug 12, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

“But those aren’t my goals anymore.” 🔥

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1. You're not an asshole. Snarky? Yes. Impatient with bullshit? Absolutely. That's why we love you. 2. Thank you for this! It's very human, which is what we're all trying to be better at, I hope. I'm glad you are going to be out on the water and not depriving yourself of it just to pretend what isn't is. Bad weather is coming. There will be plenty of time to be out of the sun and recover from microblading. But then isn't now. Now is time to be OUTSIDE and JOYFUL. I love that story for you (and for all of us).

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Lol THANK YOU!!

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Just LOVE you, dear Jessica. For all sorts of reasons, but at this moment for your honesty and your courage (and fuck the apologies!). I have had similar experiences lately, more related to aging than eyebrows, but I know deeply how challenging—and frightening—these revelations can be. And writing honestly about them as you do is invaluable support to anyone struggling with the impossible demands of a beauty culture designed to keep us desperately codependent.

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Thank you Val!! Feels like the work is constant but then again, so are the revelations <3

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This is ABSOLUTELY NOT a silly example. It shows your growth and wisdom and leads your readers to develop their own. I would have never even known that divesting from beauty culture or diet culture (hey, Virginia Sole-Smith) was possible if not for you.

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That's so so nice to hear. Thank you.

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Aug 12, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

I think it's worth noticing that a positive filled the negative -- the love for paddle boarding allowed you to let go of the need for the eyebrow procedure. With many addictions I think it's the same. Speaking from experience, yes. It's so important to have something to replace that negative activity.

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That is SUCH a good point

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I loved this. I appreciate your candor and willingness to be vulnerable. Thank you.

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Thank you Sari <3

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Aug 11, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

So many one-liners in this…but I think my favorite was the one about self-expression vs. self-rejection. Many of my unhealthy behaviors could come down to that. Thanks for sharing. :)

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The expression vs. rejection framing has been HUGE for me! So glad it resonated.

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Love this, love you, love your (non-existent) eyebrows.

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Haha thank youuuuu <3

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Aug 11, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

YES congrats on this exciting step in your journey!! The most visceral, personal wins are often the hardest to explain to a broader audience, but they're also often the victories that are the most hard-fought. Thanks for the motivation--it's nice to be reminded that even our most entrenched personal beliefs about our own beauty and appearance can be dismantled with time, learning, patience and persistence.

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Thank you!

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Aug 12, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

Never, ever apologize for the "self-centered mush"! I'm happy to read it. We're happy to read it. And happy for the little wins. It all adds up.

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Thank you <3 <3 <3

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Aug 12, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

Your liberation is the invisible beauty that trumps anything visible… hats off to your soaking forehead!

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Aug 12, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

Nothing looks as good as true liberation feels

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Aug 12, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

^ things Kate Moss should've said

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Thank you!!

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Aug 12, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino

I'm happy to read about this. I used to get expensive highlights and stopped. I also cut my hair short for the first time in over a decade. I never wanted short hair because I was convinced I'd look unattractive. Honestly, I stopped caring - it's less maintenance and makes me feel happy to fuss less. The amount of products I consume is drastically smaller than what it used to be (jojoba oil and manuka honey is where it's at). It's all about the small wins.

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HELL YES to not caring

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