My mind is blown by this. The consumption, the consumerism, all for what?! I sort of read this in fast forward as a list of everything you were saying and my mind swirled. I remember Cucumber Melon and buying a packet consisting of a wipe that was called pheromones and putting that on my neck prior to going to a club. I had completely forgotten about that memory. What was my end goal? I didn't even like men invading my personal space uninvited and gyrating...yet I put on the pheromones. It took 40 years of ups and downs and all arounds, but I'll say I am finally me. No added pheromones. No added anything. Its glorious. I hope one day it doesn't take 40 years to just say no to all the nonsense.
Good lord you are on FIRE. The way this awakened all those early aughts memories for me, except with the awareness now that we were literal children when they made the intentional choice to market this shit to us, makes me want to vomit. America has always been okay with sacrificing its children I guess, whether it's to capitalism or gun rights lunatics or any other horrifying thing.
I also had a random flashback to some website in the late aughts that would rate women's attractiveness? Like you submitted your picture and got rated? Am I hallucinating this or was it real?
Oct 25, 2022·edited Oct 25, 2022Liked by Jessica DeFino
I see myself in every line of this. Thank you so much for writing it and for sharing it with us. THIS is the kind of analysis (and so beautifully and hauntingly written!) that I crave and what makes my subscription to The Unpublishable worth every cent. I hope you never stop writing. <3
Ouch. This hit home so very hard. It also prompted me to buy Leslie C. Bell's book, so thank you for that. The commodification of women and how very VERY early it starts has always been horrifying, but this explained it so very clearly.
This is very "Beauty Myth," in the best way. That book and Backlash were the backbone of my feminist awakening. It really sucks that Naomi Wolf's mind has taken the direction it has.
*The dessert lines - I also remember Victoria’s Secret having the same thing in these years - provide exactly the “correct/safe” kind of consumption. Slap the fake frosting on your skin, but don’t dare eat a real cupcake.
My mind is blown by this. The consumption, the consumerism, all for what?! I sort of read this in fast forward as a list of everything you were saying and my mind swirled. I remember Cucumber Melon and buying a packet consisting of a wipe that was called pheromones and putting that on my neck prior to going to a club. I had completely forgotten about that memory. What was my end goal? I didn't even like men invading my personal space uninvited and gyrating...yet I put on the pheromones. It took 40 years of ups and downs and all arounds, but I'll say I am finally me. No added pheromones. No added anything. Its glorious. I hope one day it doesn't take 40 years to just say no to all the nonsense.
Thank you for sharing this <3 How could I forget Cucumber Melon??
The best part of getting older is the just saying no
I see myself in this and it is poetry. Thank you.
Thank you so so much <3
"And I need everyone to believe I do this all for me" Once we start really pondering on THAT, the curtain lifts.
That's the big one!!
this might be one of the best pieces of yours. and i love ALL OF THEM.
Thank you, Katie!!
I have been trying to wrap my head around these same feelings for years. Thank you for helping me feel less alone.
Thank you Hurley xx
Good lord you are on FIRE. The way this awakened all those early aughts memories for me, except with the awareness now that we were literal children when they made the intentional choice to market this shit to us, makes me want to vomit. America has always been okay with sacrificing its children I guess, whether it's to capitalism or gun rights lunatics or any other horrifying thing.
I also had a random flashback to some website in the late aughts that would rate women's attractiveness? Like you submitted your picture and got rated? Am I hallucinating this or was it real?
Thank you! Researching all of these trends was definitely a mindfuck lol. And you're definitely not hallucinating that site!
Hot or Not? I'm sure there were copycats too
Maybe this is weird to say but I love you very much. Thank you for your brilliance. And for seeing us.
It is not weird to say, I love you and your writing and your friendship and your insight and appreciate you so so much!!
I see myself in every line of this. Thank you so much for writing it and for sharing it with us. THIS is the kind of analysis (and so beautifully and hauntingly written!) that I crave and what makes my subscription to The Unpublishable worth every cent. I hope you never stop writing. <3
Wow, what a compliment. I really really appreciate that xx
Ouch. This hit home so very hard. It also prompted me to buy Leslie C. Bell's book, so thank you for that. The commodification of women and how very VERY early it starts has always been horrifying, but this explained it so very clearly.
Thank you Rosemary! Let me know what you think of the book xx
This is phenomenal. I am so glad I found you, and The Unpublishable - such brilliance. Thank you!
Thank you so much Jordan <3
This is very "Beauty Myth," in the best way. That book and Backlash were the backbone of my feminist awakening. It really sucks that Naomi Wolf's mind has taken the direction it has.
Thank you for this.
Ugh I totally agree. I loved that book and her latest writing is so disappointing.
I also thought of The Beauty Myth.
Glad to have recently discovered you JdF!
*The dessert lines - I also remember Victoria’s Secret having the same thing in these years - provide exactly the “correct/safe” kind of consumption. Slap the fake frosting on your skin, but don’t dare eat a real cupcake.
Damn
Beautiful writing.
Thank you <3
Yes. Thank you for making this connection (and in the most beautiful and visceral prose to boot). Consumption and literally being consumed! Gahh!
Thank you for reading!!
Excellent writing. Blown away.
Thank you <3
Consumerism! Brilliant! xo
Thanks Val!