Thanks for such an honest and heartfelt message to us readers. :)
I was so happy to discover your newsletter this year because it synthesizes so many ideas that I was thinking and feeling yet hadn’t ever seen so eloquently and honestly explored. I like how boldly you write. In this system, we need people like you so much. Thank you for telling it like it is and empowering us with truth.
First things first -- it's not co dependent to be wrecked by your mother's cancer coming back. It's called loving someone and I'm so sorry your family is going through this. It's normal to not be able to write a book under these circumstances (only toxic capitalism would tell you otherwise--but i don't need to tell you that.) The book will be written when it's written and you should not put any added pressure on yourself there.
I just discovered The Unpublishable and have lost DAYS from clicking on links and going down rabbit holes. You have confirmed things I have suspected for awhile but didn't know how to articulate. I had already been scaling back on my beauty industry consumption and your newsletter has inspired me to do more. I've already made changes because of articles you wrote.
I work in TV news and the pressure there to never age is insane. People (men and women) constantly explode at me in anger on social media for what is essentially the fact that over 20 years I've aged ("what happened to you? you used to be pretty" is the nicest version of this)
Thank you for what you do here and i'm telling everyone i know about your newsletter! It's an amazing accomplishment.
Jessica, I'm so grateful for your work, and that it allows you to live a life that doesn't have to prioritize labor. Glorious! Truly, that is the dream, and despite the challenges and set backs, your work is reaching and connecting with people in meaningful ways. I'm proud of you, and excited to continue being here on your (our) journey towards a healthier relationship with ourselves, each other, and beauty culture.
Jessica I must say your paid newsletter is my best “investment” in 2022 because it actually stops me from trying to spend thousands more dollars on med spas and overpriced skincare products. I can’t say I have completely escaped from beauty culture, but I do feel myself learning to appreciate my age and my own face features more. I’m learning to focus on other parts of my life but not always be hypercritical towards my skin and my body shape. Your newsletter acts as a tool to help me analyze my own feelings towards my appearance and my relationship with beauty culture. Thank you! Wish you and this newsletter all the best in 2023!
As a recent paid subscriber, I really appreciated this wrap up (and now I have plenty to read during my vacation lol). Your writing has given me intelligent, thoughtful frameworks for so many things I used to rage incoherently about. And reading your work has changed how I think about beauty, my body, and so many other things, so thank you! I hope 2023 is a bit easier for you 💖
Finding you has truly changed my life for the better. I feel so much more aligned with myself now that I’m not paying corporate overlords to make me feel bad about my own normal natural body. My only paid subscription on Substack and worth it every day! I’m so grateful for you and all you do 💜
You write thoughtfully and with so much passion - plus the immense research you do, all of this is why I chose a paid subscription. Wish you much success.
I pray that your mom recovers and you also receive care and love while giving that to your mom (I do not see it as codependence but love, feeling the same about my parents whom I'm blessed to still have; the last few years have seen my family band together and one of the strongest pillars, my older sister has faced cancer thrice in this time, is fighting it and we're praying for the best. So wishing your family much love and support in material terms)
Thank you. I will also add something here, if I may: I'm 42 and Indian, I live in Mumbai. My first concept of beauty, and most enduring is my Mom, I know every child will say that. The thing is, as my childhood brain saw it, my Mom has been blessed with physical beauty, and she never looked like other Moms, tired or not presentable (I don't mean this derogatorily to other ladies, and would also like to clarify that this was my childhood assessment of her), I was entranced and very conscious that I resembled not her but my Dad (again, I am lucky he looks nice and so do I if I take some trouble, and I know this is purely genetic inheritance and some work). I think I spent my teens absolutely aware I didnt look nice, I had an overbite and got braces when in my earlier 20s, and it has taken me many, many years to be comfortable with who I am. The thing is over the past several years, all I can see in my Mom is not her looks but that grace of spirit and goodness that she has (I swear I do not exaggerate), she never thinks she is beautiful and she is always one to talk of inner beauty. Today I see her and it calms me, her presence soothes me, and I want to be that for the next generation. I am also blessed to have her Mom, my beloved Granny, tiny and wrinkled and with the sweetest, most heart-stealing smile. My Granny has always considered herself not good looking but that cocoa skin, sweet smile, even greater sweetness and steadiness of character, never bitter even through tremendous tragedies of life, that is beauty. These ladies (and my Aunties) never focused on physical beauty much (mind you, they did note things like fair/dark complexion and weight - but they never shamed anyone on it, it was there to be accepted - I know I'm lucky to have this). Today at 42, I hope that beauty of spirit and of love and of duty and strength is what I can model for my sweet nieces and maybe future daughters. Apologies for this long ramble, but this is what beauty is conceptually becoming for me and this richness of beauty I am surrounded by and blessed with keeps my heart so full, that it's helped me not really get into spending for beauty.
Dear Jessica, your prioritizing your Mum and her wellbeing is testimony to your big heart and emotional alignment - don’t ever let “the system” tell you differently. Meanwhile, you are now queen of a growing empire of independent, smart women… We love you!
This is disguised as a nurturing helping hand. And you Jessica slapped that hand, turned it over and let all the falsehood of what beauty really is, just fall out, fall down and out. There is so much power to regain by letting all this go and trust nature again, our very skin, our very glow. Thank you!
Thank you for a year of eye-opening, literally life-changing (as in it has changed how I conduct parts of my life) reporting. I hope the tough parts of your life start to ease and pivot for the better in 2023.
I really loved your articles "I Want You To Lick Me" and "You Have Fossil Fuels on Your Face." You have a powerful voice and I look forward to continuing to read your work!
Jess, hasn't anyone ever told you you're supposed to blow your deadlines at least four times? I'm thrilled by your success here and by the attendant support you're getting for your terrific work. xo
I've spent like 45 minutes trying to write this comment because words just cannot express how much The Unpublishable means to me. Jessica, your work has changed my life. Everything you write pushes me, challenges me, amazes me. My Unpublishable subscription is always the best $7 I spend every month. I'm so so happy that your work continues to reach more and more people every day and that you have been able to make a sustainable living as a writer through The Unpublishable. You deserve the freedom to write fearlessly, the time and space to produce thoughtful and meaningful work, and the ability to fully live without prioritizing labor. I'm so, so proud of you and everything you've created with this platform. I'm so grateful you exist—I don't know who or where I would be without having done the work that your writing pushes me to do every single day. Thank you, thank you, thank you for everything. I'm send you and your mom so much love <3
Jessica, that means so much to me, you have no idea! Thank you for sharing that and for being here and for supporting my work, Sending you so much love for the new year xx
The Unpublishable is true medicine; when I feel the clawing of that 'lack' I dive in to an article and I feel better, nourished and full of energy to stand strong in the world again. I hope it is as valuable a medicine to write, as it is for all of us to read. Thank you for doing the work. Love to you and your family x
Thanks for such an honest and heartfelt message to us readers. :)
I was so happy to discover your newsletter this year because it synthesizes so many ideas that I was thinking and feeling yet hadn’t ever seen so eloquently and honestly explored. I like how boldly you write. In this system, we need people like you so much. Thank you for telling it like it is and empowering us with truth.
Thank you Elle! I'm so happy to have you here xx
First things first -- it's not co dependent to be wrecked by your mother's cancer coming back. It's called loving someone and I'm so sorry your family is going through this. It's normal to not be able to write a book under these circumstances (only toxic capitalism would tell you otherwise--but i don't need to tell you that.) The book will be written when it's written and you should not put any added pressure on yourself there.
I just discovered The Unpublishable and have lost DAYS from clicking on links and going down rabbit holes. You have confirmed things I have suspected for awhile but didn't know how to articulate. I had already been scaling back on my beauty industry consumption and your newsletter has inspired me to do more. I've already made changes because of articles you wrote.
I work in TV news and the pressure there to never age is insane. People (men and women) constantly explode at me in anger on social media for what is essentially the fact that over 20 years I've aged ("what happened to you? you used to be pretty" is the nicest version of this)
Thank you for what you do here and i'm telling everyone i know about your newsletter! It's an amazing accomplishment.
Thank you, Kirsten — I really need to hear that <3 <3 <3
Jessica, I'm so grateful for your work, and that it allows you to live a life that doesn't have to prioritize labor. Glorious! Truly, that is the dream, and despite the challenges and set backs, your work is reaching and connecting with people in meaningful ways. I'm proud of you, and excited to continue being here on your (our) journey towards a healthier relationship with ourselves, each other, and beauty culture.
Thank you!! I'm so grateful to have you here :)
Jessica I must say your paid newsletter is my best “investment” in 2022 because it actually stops me from trying to spend thousands more dollars on med spas and overpriced skincare products. I can’t say I have completely escaped from beauty culture, but I do feel myself learning to appreciate my age and my own face features more. I’m learning to focus on other parts of my life but not always be hypercritical towards my skin and my body shape. Your newsletter acts as a tool to help me analyze my own feelings towards my appearance and my relationship with beauty culture. Thank you! Wish you and this newsletter all the best in 2023!
Thank you so so much, I am SO happy to hear that. Sending you love for 2023 too xx
As a recent paid subscriber, I really appreciated this wrap up (and now I have plenty to read during my vacation lol). Your writing has given me intelligent, thoughtful frameworks for so many things I used to rage incoherently about. And reading your work has changed how I think about beauty, my body, and so many other things, so thank you! I hope 2023 is a bit easier for you 💖
Thank you so much!!
Finding you has truly changed my life for the better. I feel so much more aligned with myself now that I’m not paying corporate overlords to make me feel bad about my own normal natural body. My only paid subscription on Substack and worth it every day! I’m so grateful for you and all you do 💜
That means so so much to me. I'm grateful to you for being here :)
You write thoughtfully and with so much passion - plus the immense research you do, all of this is why I chose a paid subscription. Wish you much success.
I pray that your mom recovers and you also receive care and love while giving that to your mom (I do not see it as codependence but love, feeling the same about my parents whom I'm blessed to still have; the last few years have seen my family band together and one of the strongest pillars, my older sister has faced cancer thrice in this time, is fighting it and we're praying for the best. So wishing your family much love and support in material terms)
Thank you so much for this. Sending love and prayers to your family and your sister too <3
Thank you. I will also add something here, if I may: I'm 42 and Indian, I live in Mumbai. My first concept of beauty, and most enduring is my Mom, I know every child will say that. The thing is, as my childhood brain saw it, my Mom has been blessed with physical beauty, and she never looked like other Moms, tired or not presentable (I don't mean this derogatorily to other ladies, and would also like to clarify that this was my childhood assessment of her), I was entranced and very conscious that I resembled not her but my Dad (again, I am lucky he looks nice and so do I if I take some trouble, and I know this is purely genetic inheritance and some work). I think I spent my teens absolutely aware I didnt look nice, I had an overbite and got braces when in my earlier 20s, and it has taken me many, many years to be comfortable with who I am. The thing is over the past several years, all I can see in my Mom is not her looks but that grace of spirit and goodness that she has (I swear I do not exaggerate), she never thinks she is beautiful and she is always one to talk of inner beauty. Today I see her and it calms me, her presence soothes me, and I want to be that for the next generation. I am also blessed to have her Mom, my beloved Granny, tiny and wrinkled and with the sweetest, most heart-stealing smile. My Granny has always considered herself not good looking but that cocoa skin, sweet smile, even greater sweetness and steadiness of character, never bitter even through tremendous tragedies of life, that is beauty. These ladies (and my Aunties) never focused on physical beauty much (mind you, they did note things like fair/dark complexion and weight - but they never shamed anyone on it, it was there to be accepted - I know I'm lucky to have this). Today at 42, I hope that beauty of spirit and of love and of duty and strength is what I can model for my sweet nieces and maybe future daughters. Apologies for this long ramble, but this is what beauty is conceptually becoming for me and this richness of beauty I am surrounded by and blessed with keeps my heart so full, that it's helped me not really get into spending for beauty.
I love this so much!! Thank you for sharing it <3
Dear Jessica, your prioritizing your Mum and her wellbeing is testimony to your big heart and emotional alignment - don’t ever let “the system” tell you differently. Meanwhile, you are now queen of a growing empire of independent, smart women… We love you!
I'm so grateful this work brought us together! Thank you Sandra!!
Sorry to hear it has been such a challenging year, thank you for continuing this newsletter and all the work you do amidst it all!
Thank you Carla <3
This is disguised as a nurturing helping hand. And you Jessica slapped that hand, turned it over and let all the falsehood of what beauty really is, just fall out, fall down and out. There is so much power to regain by letting all this go and trust nature again, our very skin, our very glow. Thank you!
Super healing powers for your Mom 🙏. L
Thank you Laura <3
Thank you for a year of eye-opening, literally life-changing (as in it has changed how I conduct parts of my life) reporting. I hope the tough parts of your life start to ease and pivot for the better in 2023.
I really loved your articles "I Want You To Lick Me" and "You Have Fossil Fuels on Your Face." You have a powerful voice and I look forward to continuing to read your work!
Thank you so much!! It means the world to have you here xx
Jess, hasn't anyone ever told you you're supposed to blow your deadlines at least four times? I'm thrilled by your success here and by the attendant support you're getting for your terrific work. xo
OK good I'm right on track then!! :)
I've spent like 45 minutes trying to write this comment because words just cannot express how much The Unpublishable means to me. Jessica, your work has changed my life. Everything you write pushes me, challenges me, amazes me. My Unpublishable subscription is always the best $7 I spend every month. I'm so so happy that your work continues to reach more and more people every day and that you have been able to make a sustainable living as a writer through The Unpublishable. You deserve the freedom to write fearlessly, the time and space to produce thoughtful and meaningful work, and the ability to fully live without prioritizing labor. I'm so, so proud of you and everything you've created with this platform. I'm so grateful you exist—I don't know who or where I would be without having done the work that your writing pushes me to do every single day. Thank you, thank you, thank you for everything. I'm send you and your mom so much love <3
Jessica, that means so much to me, you have no idea! Thank you for sharing that and for being here and for supporting my work, Sending you so much love for the new year xx
I’m so sorry about your mom. May 2023 be better for you both. Thank you for your honesty and hard work.
Thank you so much <3
I am SO proud of you! You are my biggest inspiration ❤️
Love you so!!!
The Unpublishable is true medicine; when I feel the clawing of that 'lack' I dive in to an article and I feel better, nourished and full of energy to stand strong in the world again. I hope it is as valuable a medicine to write, as it is for all of us to read. Thank you for doing the work. Love to you and your family x
Thank you so much, Imogen. It means a lot to hear that xx